Well isn’t North Korea just the pipsqueak in the room wearing fluorescent yellow from head to toe and holding a homemade poster-board-and-black-Sharpie-marker-crafted sign demanding “LOOK OVER HERE!”
Whoop dee doo.
Little Kim Wrong Urn — or whatever his name is — sticks out like the scurrying, er, swaggering bully in the office. You just want to rip off the hair he has fastened with Scotch tape to his tail and declare, “See? You’re a filthy little rat trying to pose as a squirrel, and you ain’t a’foolin’ nobody. Scram!”
He’s also reminiscent of the boss you had years ago who actually believed he had a handle on what went on in that workplace. He (or she) walked around as if he knew what he was doing while everyone else got the work done. You might even be tempted to pat him on the head, he’s so cute — thinking he knows what he’s doing.
I know: It’s hard not to stare at such incompetence, or such laughable bluster, or such ridiculous attention-getting behavior. But, seriously, the United States needs to glance North Korea’s way, snort with derision, add a scoff for good measure and just move on.
Crawl back in your hole, you little pissant.
The saber-rattling of late by (I’m guessing) 12-year-old Kim Jong Un and his regime reminds me of someone with a tattoo on his face, or multiple piercings that are over the top, or a mohawk, or purple hair. Wouldn’t it be easier just to buy a T-shirt that says “Pay attention to me!”?
North Korea just wants to be in the spotlight. They must be bored. It goes without saying that our military keeps an eye on them — and yet, I just said it…go figure — but beyond that, ignore them.
Oh, I know: “What if they launch a missile?” If it goes into the ocean, call the ASPCA, Whale Division. Then go back to a global discussion about toenail fungus or something more pressing. “What if they launch a missile and it hits Japan or Guam or South Korea and people get killed?” Then retaliate accordingly. “What if they launch a nuclear bomb?” Then we’ll see if radiation can help us grow 12 ears of corn from one stalk and feed the whole world.
Until then, chill.
No, of course I’m not that flippant about nuclear war or any war. But I’m sick of little dictators (emphasis on first syllable of that last word, just ’cause I’m a grouch today) stirring up nonsense with their blabber. And I’m even more tired of us falling for it.
Kim Jong Un isn’t any different than any other bully. They bluster, they spout, and as soon as you get tired of it, stand up, and say, “SHUT UP,” they scurry back to their nasty little hole in the ground and cower.
This is reminiscent of ol’ Saddam Hussein. He was mostly hot air, but “we” (not all of us) fell for it and went to war. Some of us were against it from the start: After all, why unseat that evil dictator and not every other one around the world? That may be water under the bridge, but there are lessons to be learned.
God bless our troops for giving their all no matter where a bunch of idiot politicians send them. I couldn’t do it. Our military folks and their families are amazing. My hat’s off to them.
It’s my mittens, though — so you can see the gesture I’m making — that are off to North Korea’s dictatorship and every other bully like them. You’re wasting our time. What we should be focused on is how many people around the globe don’t have enough to eat. We ought to be solving problems like the lack of decent drinking water for much of the world’s population.
How about the sinfully uneven distribution of resources such as food on our planet? Anyone get riled for the epidemic of poor education that plagues this society?
I guess those issues aren’t as snazzy as the idea of a big bomb in the sky.
I think much of humanity these days must thrive on drama. “NORTH KOREA MAY TEST MULTIPLE MISSILES” blares one headline this week. Well, my neighbor “may” pull out a Civil War cannon and take out the little old lady across the street, too, but I’m not posted by my front window waiting to see it. I got better things to do.
I’m sure it’s a combination of 24-hour news media trying to pull in viewers, and politicians scrambling to some way, any way, make a headline, but we all seem to hopscotch from one “crisis” or “outrage” to another.
The government wants to take all our guns! The “evil” conservatives want to force everyone to be Christian!! Another nutcase attacked a gym full of bunny rabbits and cut off all their ears to use to make himself a belt!!!
Are you excited, scared, worried and interested yet?!
North Korea sees this and has to get into the action. “Kim Jong Un has his finger on the red button!” a news flash might read. “The DPRK (North Korea’s real name, “Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea” — funny name for a dictatorship) starts new exercise program of troops parading up and down the streets in a menacing fashion!”
Maybe even, “Anonymous source: As kindergartner, Kim Jong Un drew a picture of a missile being launched at his grade school! Experts sure this means he has aggressive dislike of mathematics! What that means for the US ... tune in at 10!”
OK, I some of made those up, but you get the point.
Perhaps we’re overlooking the simple solution to the annoying pipsqueak of the Eastern Hemisphere. Maybe someone just needs to send some letters to Kim Jong Un with lots of XXXs and OOOs so that he gets the attention he needs. I bet the guy is cranky ’cause he hasn’t had enough hugs lately.
Or maybe he should just get a puppy, or a kitten — they’ll play with anyone.
Meanwhile, let’s go mushroom hunting. There’s sure to be some new drama in the world when we get back.